The pros and cons of social media

The following is taken from Lindsay Kite and Lexie Kite’s book, More Than a Body, Your Body is an Instrument, Not an Ornament. Buckle up- this is a long one.

One of the greatest challenges we all face is how to navigate social media without drowning in self-comparison and the insatiable desire for validation. You might think that by not having your own social media profile, you are missing out on the fun things all your friends are experiencing, but what you are really missing out on is often heartache, disappointment, comparison, loneliness and feelings of inadequacy.

When you’re really really wanting to have social media, it’s important to consider the Pros and the Cons side by side:

Pros

• You will be able to interact with your friends online

• You won’t be left out of what is happening online

• You will be able to participate in fun and entertaining communities where people share their talents and hobbies

• You will be exposed to interesting content and important ideas and people you might not see otherwise like activism for important causes, experts in cool subjects and people doing good in the world

• You’ll be able to express yourself through posting pictures, videos and captions

  Next, it’s important to consider what you might not like about using the app or platform you are hoping to join. What can you imagine finding or experiencing that could be negative or hurtful to yourself or others? Have you seen any of these negative effects in your own life or in the lives of people you know and love? Consider these downsides:

  Cons

• You might be more likely to experience increased loneliness. Social media can be isolating and leads to feelings of FOMO or “fear of missing out”. While you might like the interaction from likes, follows and DMs, in the long run, many people are left feeling more alone and isolated.

• You might be more likely to experience depression and anxiety, and the more time you spend on social media, the worse these feelings can get.

• You might be more likely to compare yourself to the people you see on Instagram. Self-comparison causes you to feel less love toward and unity with those you are comparing yourself to. It also makes you feel worse about yourself, even if you think you “win” the comparison.

• You might be more likely to be preoccupied with your looks (also known as self-objectification). Your appearance will be front and center in your mind, and that makes it hard to focus on anything else, whether you like the way you look or not. This can hurt your schoolwork, your relationships, your health, your mental and physical capabilities and your happiness.

• You might be more likely to experience negative body image or feel bad about your body, because you will be more sensitive to how you appear after seeing so many idealized photos, ads and highlight reels.

• You will be more likely to be exposed to harmful messages and ideas and images that you might not see otherwise and might not be prepared to understand, like objectification, pornography, self-harm, pro-anorexia (“pro-ana”) messaging, digital manipulation of photos, misleading advertising and beauty represented in very narrow, unattainable ways.

• You will be more likely to become desensitized to the messages that hurt you and that cause you to think about your body and your looks more than who you are as a person, which can lead to feeling ashamed and fixated on your body.

  If you decide after reviewing these lists and talking with your parents that you are going to start using these apps, here are a few important guidelines that will make a world of difference for your health and safety:

  1. Make your profile private

  2. Turn off notifications

  3. Avoid the ‘explore’ page on Instagram

  4. Set boundaries and time limits

  5. Don’t allow direct messages from people you aren’t already following

  6. Never send nude pictures and delete them if you receive them

These won’t protect you from all harms, but they are a good place to start. Know that you can always take breaks or quit using them altogether at any point. Also, if you see disturbing images or feel confused or upset about things, please go talk to your parent or a trusted adult.