Take it slow…

Are you frustrated by your parents’ restrictions around social media or phone usage? If so, I that’s understandable. Let’s think about what it is you actually want from social media/a smart phone. Connection? Conversation? Companionship? Ok- totally valid. But is there a way to get these things without using apps?

If you’re already using social media, consider how you typically feel afterward. Maybe even keep a journal for a week or two, documenting your emotional state before hand and then after. My guess is that it’s complicated.

Most studies have found a link between teenage smartphone use and mental health problems. Even more telling is that the timing and logic line up: Teen mental health began to decline around 10 to 15 years ago, just as smartphones, Facebook and other social media were becoming used daily. Nobody has offered a persuasive explanation for the decline other than the revolution in daily life caused by technology.

A recent study of 27,969 young adults shows that the later the age at which they first got a phone or tablet that they could carry with them in childhood, the better their mental wellbeing as adults.

So if your parents are holding out on getting you a smartphone or letting you use social media, ask them for what it is you really need: more time with friends, a method of communication, more privacy or independence. My guess is that these changes will give you more of what will actually help you feel better and that they may help you feel like you don’t need that smartphone to feel connected.

You could also ask for a ‘dumb phone’, otherwise known as a phone. A smartphone is actually a computer. You could convince your parents that this is a great option, as there are no ‘apps’ and it costs way less. Remind them that they probably had one of these or a pager, this might help them understand how it could be good for you as well.

If your parents aren’t putting restrictions on your device use, perhaps you could try it on your own. Utilize the timer-restrictions on apps or just take note of how much screentime you’re using through your settings on your phone. If you feel like you aren’t able to get things done, (homework, exercise, laundry, etc) then consider cutting back on screentime in order to be more productive. Chances are, you have the time. It’s just being used online. This is a battle adults have as well, so don’t feel bad. Just set a goal for yourself and start slow. Any change is hard. AND all change is meaningful. Let me know how it goes.